The Unspoken Story of a Sugar Daddy

In the world of sugar dating, the sugar baby’s tales are often the focus. However, this isn’t about them; this is the story of a sugar daddy.

Let’s begin at the beginning, to understand why an elderly man is alone, tears streaming down his face, for a decision he regrets.

I am 70. I’ve been married for 38 years.

When we first got married, we were swingers, and had lots of fun. We stopped for a while to have a kid. Fast forward to ten years ago, my wife went through menopause. Sex became painful for her. I was too young to embrace celibacy. So, with my wife’s knowledge, I found my first sugar baby. I was with her for a few years, until she found a boyfriend. A couple of years later, I met number 2. We were together for almost three years, but her mother didn’t approve, so I stopped again for a long time. Until last year, my mother passed. That reminded me of living life to the fullest. So, that’s when I met her – I found her online from a sugar daddy site. From the first time we met, I was in love.

This pretty, intelligent young lady was interested in seeing me.

I am set. My wife and I own a home, and with all we have, it would be hard to split. Not to mention the children and other family members.

I was in heaven, with my wife knowing that I have a lady, and this sweet lady with me.

I did what I shouldn’t have. I fell in love with her.

Knowing she was with me because I helped her. We spent enough time together, it happened.

This is the second place I made a mistake. I tried to break up with her. After she showed me a video of her and her last sugar daddy having sex while she was eating another girl out, she told me she didn’t like sex. I could do to her whatever I wanted, but she wasn’t going to enjoy it. She was doing this for me to make me feel better. She felt obligated to do it. I wanted a girl who wanted me; I felt like she was sexually broken. I didn’t want her to feel like I was forcing her to bed. So, I told her that. And I started looking for a new replacement girlfriend, with her support. She even introduced me to a lady friend of hers, who could be a possible replacement. When she was telling the young lady about us, she told the young lady that she had a replacement for me lined up already, he was farther away and wouldn’t have to have the sex that I required.

Well, it didn’t work out between me and the lady she introduced us. Which is not really surprising. I’m so hung up on my sugar baby when I was with the new lady all we talked about was my girl.

After I found out she didn’t like sex. And I was looking around for a new baby.  My wife noticed a lot more text messaging and so we discussed what was going on, and the money I was spending. Talked about everything, even a divorce.    At a point of that “Discussion” if I thought my sugar baby would have me, I would have left my wife, for my sugar baby.  My sugar baby could have snapped her finger and changed everything. I guess I am glad she didn’t, maybe…

I couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt that was consuming me. I knew I had made a mistake by falling in love with her, but I couldn’t help it. I tried to convince myself that it was just a fleeting feeling, but it was becoming harder and harder to ignore. I couldn’t stop thinking about her, and the memories we made together. I missed her laughter, her touch, and the way she looked at me. I knew I had to do something, but I wasn’t sure what.

I decided to reach out to her, to try and apologize and explain my feelings. I knew it was risky, but I couldn’t live with the regret anymore. I sent her a message, explaining everything, from how I felt about her, to why I tried to break up with her, and why I was reaching out now. I told her that I didn’t want to hurt her and that I knew I had made a mistake. I begged her to forgive me and to give me another chance.

I waited for what felt like an eternity for a response. I was filled with anxiety, wondering if I had made a huge mistake, or if she would even respond. After what felt like hours, I finally received a message. She told me that she never really left me.  But without her wanting me in bed, her telling me she still cares does completely make sense at this point.

So she went on a trip this weekend. To see a “friend,” and is staying a few days. Before when she was on trips, she would send me a picture of her doing something, standing in front of something, laying on the beach, but this time no. She didn’t.   She didn’t say and I may be wrong but most likely she is off with her new sugar daddy.  I only want the best for her, even if it is not me. So good for her, I want her happy.  

But that leaves me thinking she is going to let this other guy use her for the same reason at some point  But it leaves me here asking myself if I should have just kept using her, and never have said anything. She went into this relationship knowing I was going to be using her. And by stopping using her, am I letting her down or did I let her down?

I am sitting here with a broken heart knowing that I still love her .